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I know she has to go and won’t: What to do!


Everything was going great; you knew Baby's timing like clockwork! But now when you offer the potty, she arches her back and squiggles like she's done before she's even started!

What to do with a baby you know has to go and won't?? Hear what causes potty time “resistance” and four solutions to roll with it like a pro!

You will hear:

  • what parents sometimes mistake for potty time resistance
  • how developmental milestones can affect potty time
  • FOUR solutions for potty time “resistance”

Links and other resources mentioned today:

Download the Transcript

If you can't listen to this episode right now (um, sleeping baby!?) and read the transcript here:

Transcript download: I know she has to go and won’t: What to do!

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If you want to watch me record today’s podcast episode, you can do that on my youtube version right here:

Thanks for Listening!

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  • Share your thoughts by leaving a note in the comments section below!

Which of the four solutions for resistance have you tried when experiencing resistance with your babe?

Please leave a comment below with your thoughts

I look forward to discussing with you in the comments, below!

xx Andrea

Andrea Olson

About Andrea Olson

I'm Andrea and I spend most of my time with my 6 children (all under 12 yo) and the rest of my time teaching other new parents how to do Elimination Communication with their 0-18 month babies. I love what I do and try to make a difference in one baby or parent's life every single day. (And I love, love, love, mango gelato.)


  1. Avatar Irina on February 1, 2022 at 8:13 am

    My baby is about to be 6 months and we have done EC for 3 months now with great success and catch 90 % of poops and some pees, were able to go days without dirty diapers and he would always let us know. But we recently started some solids and started cloth diapers. It seems to be harder to time poops, even when i know he needs to go. And most of the time he will go the second he is put into the carseat, even though we just had a pottytunity in which he didnt do anything. How do i let him know that carseat is not a place to potty.

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on March 8, 2022 at 3:04 am

      Next time before you put your little one in the carseat, try offering him the potty in the car before putting him into the carseat.

  2. Avatar Elizabeth on February 1, 2022 at 10:12 am

    Do you have any other resources that address babies who seem bored on the toilet? Mine is 11.5 months, and for the past 6-8 weeks, she arches her back to get off of the toilet, but I KNOW she has to go, because she will stand there and pee on the floor before I can even get her diaper back on. I know she’s developing new skills and is so close to walking that I’m sure that’s part of it. I’ve just been “giving it time” and it seems to just be dragging on for what feels like forever.

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on March 8, 2022 at 3:19 am

      Yes, those phases can “feel like forever.” I will reassure you, they do pass.

      As far as keeping your little one occupied and distracted on the toilet, it can take a little bit of trial and error. Some little ones are happy with being read a book, others need play dough or something in their hands to keep them busy, while others need the toilet moved. Just try to get creative and try different things out. Listen to your gut. Having special potty toys can also help sometimes.

  3. Avatar Natalie on February 11, 2022 at 7:51 am

    Hi Andrea,
    I enjoyed this podcast. Totally relevant for me but I feel I have an additional issue I would appreciate your insight into.
    My baby is 11 weeks, we have been doing EC since 3 weeks. I love it and dont know how anyone does just diapers. Things had been going great but the last couple days my baby freaks out when I bring him to the change table where I keep the baby potty. He cries so hard when I firstly take his diaper off, and then cries even harder when I put him on the potty. He does pee sometimes once he’s on there. I feel bad though, like I’m forcing him to go. Recently he also just refuses to pee, waits for the diaper and pees right away. He doesn’t seem bothered by being wet.
    Should I just continue what I’m doing and assume this will pass? I tried moving the potty to the bathroom, this didn’t help.
    Should I just power through the crying and keep trying to put him on the potty? As you know, it’s so hard to watch your baby cry and it makes me feel bad even though my goal is to make him more comfortable.
    Is there a baby toilet seat reducer you recommend? All the ones I’ve seen seem to be for tots.

    Thank you for your work! I am so happy to have found out about EC and it still as because of you.

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on May 3, 2022 at 4:38 pm

      Hi! I know it’s so hard to hear your baby cry. This will pass, maybe taking a bit of time to just hold baby to calm him then potty. Talking to him throughout the whole process may help calm him as well.

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