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“Help! We have complete resistance!” (part 1)

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Everything was going just great – what’s up with the sudden resistance? Today on Ask Andrea, I share part 1 of the “what, how, and why” of sudden EC resistance and how you can interpret and respond to it like a parenting pro.

 

You Will Hear:

  • what sudden resistance really means (hint: it’s probably good news)
  • how to roll with resistance without losing your cool
  • tools that encourage emerging independence
  • a resource for constipation
  • the value of your intuition (and how to hear it)
  • when to do a pottying reset
  • how to evaluate the Hybrid Plan vs. Tiny Potty Training

 

Links and other resources mentioned today:

Watch the Video Version

If you want to watch me record today’s podcast episode, you can do that on my youtube version right here:

Resource Recommendation

Go Diaper Free: my popular EC book that simplifies EC, beginning to end

Thanks for Listening!

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  • Share your thoughts by leaving a note in the comments section below!

 

Head over and let me know, Have you experienced sudden resistance with EC? What worked for you?

I look forward to discussing with you in the comments, below!

xx Andrea

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Andrea Olson

About Andrea Olson

I'm Andrea and I spend most of my time with my 6 children (all under 12 yo) and the rest of my time teaching other new parents how to do Elimination Communication with their 0-18 month babies. I love what I do and try to make a difference in one baby or parent's life every single day. (And I love, love, love, mango gelato.)

9 Comments

  1. Avatar Kelly on October 20, 2022 at 4:26 pm

    My little is 14.5 months. We started with the hybrid at 12.5 months. She was doing well and although we didn’t have any completely dry day, she would usually go when I timed it correctly. Starting last week when I started back to work part time (5 hours on Monday/Wednesday), she has completely refused to sit on any potty – big with reducer or mini. She was in diapers at the nursery for my work hours. They aren’t equipped to handle potty training or EC since there is no bathroom in the classroom. We are going to take a pause – 2 weeks or until she stops melting down as soon as we step in the bathroom (we change diapers in there). Any tips or suggestions for when we start back up again? I was really enjoying less diaper laundry (cloth diapers) and only washing a few sets of wet clothes a day. But I don’t want her in the habit of just wetting her pants all the time if she refuses to sit on the potty now.

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on October 21, 2022 at 7:20 pm

      Life changes can cause all sorts of potty pauses, it’s totally okay to take a pause and start back up again once you have all adjusted to the new schedule. Give yourself patience and grace as you start this journey again with your little one. EC is not a linear journey and every baby progresses differently. Be gentle with yourself momma.

    • Avatar Charlotte on October 21, 2022 at 10:24 pm

      When I wrapped up EC with toilet training at 15 months, things went quite well, but then suddenly didnt want to use the toilet at about 18 months and just started wetting his pants all the time.

      I came up with the idea of letting him pee in differnt place and making it a bit exciting,
      He can now have a choose to pee in the toilet, potty, bath, in the bush out side, under a tree, etc. It was fun for him to put his “peepee” in new place and when I saw a clear chance, being down to about one miss a day I started weaning him off other options.
      All these options needed to me with my doing an ec hold with him so he would know he can just pee anywhere, anytime.

      Hope this helps some one xx

  2. Avatar Fernanda on October 26, 2022 at 1:34 am

    I have been using a program that really works well for us. We started at 3 months old and she is now 15 months old.I started with a chart and a sticker system. I put a picture of her diaper on the chart and we would take it off when she pees or poops on the potty. At first she will get really excited about taking the diaper off, so you might have to have a few on hand when she pees just to get her excited about taking them off.

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on October 31, 2022 at 7:03 pm

      That’s awesome!!! So happy you found a system that works for your little one!!!

  3. Avatar Gerilyn on November 8, 2022 at 10:41 am

    I’ve been doing EC with my baby since 8weeks. She is now 13 months. Some days it feels as if we make huge leaps, using 1-2 diapers all day, others 5-6.

    She often resists putting a diaper (cloth) on but loves training pants. BUT she rarely signals to pee anymore, just pees everywhere if I haven’t timed it right & given her a potty break. I don’t make a big deal about it, no comment at all, just clean it up & put her in a dry diaper.

    In the last two weeks I switched to only cloth diapers at night (was doing one disposable) to build more consistency & she has gone on complete strike from middle of the night peeing- though she’s nursing, asleepish, while on potty (so no tears) – BUT either dry diaper in AM or small pee.

    Now she’ll also resist peeing (when I know she needs to go), & then pee in her diaper afterward. I swap between mini potty & reducer when there is resistance & it often seems to help.

    She does extremely well out of the house, but at home it’s 50/50.

    She also doesn’t mind a wet diaper. I read the articles on pauses & giving them more independence, so I’ve tried to tell her I’d wait for her to tell me when she needs to go & she simply doesn’t care & doesn’t signal at all.

    Unsure of best way to proceed from here. Thanks!

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on November 15, 2022 at 9:49 pm

      First of all you got this mama!!! You could try doing some naked time and a reset to help encourage that mind body connection. You could try also using some tiny trainers as a transition to undies that way she can still feel some wetness. Also since she is already wet, maybe incorporating some natural consequences such as having her help clean up after herself when she gets the floor wet and or getting a super quick shower to clean up. You are doing a great job!!!

  4. Avatar Shasta on November 29, 2022 at 6:20 pm

    We started EC when babe was about 4 days old and it’s been great — until about the last month (he’s 8.5 months right now). All our struggles are during the day, at night he still wakes up whenever he needs to pee so we catch almost all nighttime pees in the pot. During the day is pretty much the opposite now, Just in the last month or so, he stopped letting me know when he needs to go and when I give him an opportunity, he screams and wiggles like mad to get himself off the pot, then crawls away. (Sometimes we use the bowl that we’ve had from the beginning and sometimes the baby bjorn potty, he goes in both/fights both almost equally.) When this first started I thought it was because he didn’t actually need to go so I would give him a few minutes of diaper free crawling and he would almost immediately pee on the floor, so obviously now the diaper goes back on right away, but he fights the diaper too. So now during the day we are lucky if we catch 50% of the pees. Poops we almost always catch because his poop face is really clear if I’m paying attention. But even then he sometimes puts up a big fight trying to get off the pot, so much that a couple times poop gets everywhere.
    I’ve been reading all I could find here about sudden resistance but in all the examples, babe is 12+ months, older than my little guy. He is not walking but definitely could still be a struggle for independence. Should we give it a break?
    Thanks for any help!

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on December 3, 2022 at 10:05 pm

      Hi! First of all you are doing great! Sometimes taking a short break is 100% needed. Taking a week or so then coming back and doing a week reset focusing on naked time, timings, and signing could be super helpful. Offering a bit more independence could also be a game changer. If you haven’t heard yet, I have a new subscription service Potty Tribe where parents and certified GDF coaches all come together weekly over Zoom to go over potty troubleshooting anything you may be experiencing with your little one.

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