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How to Solve Potty Resistance During Wrap-up: For Elimination Communication and Potty Training

veganbirthcollective may 8

Your EC experience was going great until you started to pass the baton. Then, wham, resistance! What does this mean? Is the process doomed to failure? Should you just “wait until they're ready”?

Listen today to hear why resistance happens during wrap-up, two tools to solve it, and how to tweak your mindset for the smoothest experience possible.

You will hear:

  • why resistance happens
  • how this applies to you (even if you're not wrapping up, yet!)
  • two routes to wrapping up your EC (or diapering) experience
  • the two tools you need to address resistance
  • how to tweak your mindset to solve resistance
  • tips for poop issues with late potty trainers

Links and other resources mentioned today:

Download the Transcript

If you can't listen to this episode right now (um, sleeping baby!?)...download and read the transcript here:

Transcript download: How to Solve Potty Resistance During Wrap-up

Watch the Video Version (new!)

If you want to watch me record today’s podcast episode, you can do that on my youtube version right here:

Thanks for Listening!

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Which resource are you going to use for solving potty resistance during wrap-up?

Please leave a comment below with your thoughts

I look forward to discussing with you in the comments, below!

xx Andrea

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Andrea Olson

About Andrea Olson

I'm Andrea and I spend most of my time with my 6 children (all under 12 yo) and the rest of my time teaching other new parents how to do Elimination Communication with their 0-18 month babies. I love what I do and try to make a difference in one baby or parent's life every single day. (And I love, love, love, mango gelato.)

14 Comments

  1. Avatar Cassandra Neal on December 7, 2021 at 8:35 am

    I have a 13 month old and struggling with getting him back on the potty. I will try sit down and pull pants down to see if that helps any. But how can I give privacy when he can fall into the toilet or fall off his baby toilet? He’s still crawling…

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on January 14, 2022 at 6:23 pm

      Looking away can sometimes help, and getting busy. Like doing something on your phone.

      You can also try putting pillows down in front of the potty if you are afraid of your little one getting hurt if he falls off.

  2. Avatar Melissa Miller on December 8, 2021 at 10:31 am

    Oh my gosh this is exactly the guidance I need today! I’m in this process and feeling close to putting it off because my daughter is getting so upset! So, thank you! I have three follow up questions… (1) My daughter gets panicked if I try and put her on the adult toilet (with a reducer). Can you offer any guidance to helping her get comfortable on it? and (2) when I give her privacy she hops right off the potty. If I close us into the bathroom will she eventually stay seated on the potty when I turn my head? (3) If I’m working toward putting her on the adult potty, is there any problem with also having the tiny potties around the house for her to go on that by herself if she wants? or should I just simplify and have her only go on the adult toilet?

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on January 14, 2022 at 6:28 pm

      Love when things work out like that!

      To answer your questions:
      1. Do some role playing with a doll or lovey that sits on the toilet. You can try distracting her while she is on the toilet. Sometimes having them look at photos of themselves or reading a book. Talking about sitting on the toilet a lot throughout the day.

      2. That’s great that she stays seated when you are in the bathroom. Offering privacy by turning your head or pretending to do something can give her privacy with your presence. You may also try saying… I’ll be right back… I forgot something, and then step out for a minute.

      3. No problem to have other potties around the house available. Or for her to even use those independently when you are busy.

  3. Avatar Kristin on December 8, 2021 at 9:11 pm

    My first baby I did EC really inconsistently and finally potty trained at 2.5 years, and it did feel like finally, though it was earlier than most, and it was over in a couple of weeks and I thought, wow this is great, why didn’t we do that ages ago. Baby 2 is 9 months now and I’ve been way more consistent with EC though don’t really ever do diaper free time. I’d been thinking do it til about 2 and then potty train, but this post came at a good time for me and I’m feeling hopeful for wrapping up EC earlier. (yes I have the book, I read most of it early on but never got around to the wrapping up bit of the book yet)

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on January 14, 2022 at 6:32 pm

      Thank you for sharing your story, and glad the post gave you some motivation to wrap up sooner!

  4. Avatar Charlène on December 10, 2021 at 11:44 am

    Hi Andrea,
    Thank you for all your resources. I admire tour work.
    I have been reading a lot of your EC teachings and tried to apply them.
    My son will be 18 month next week. Last month I bought your potty training book ans started the process. By the Book. For 2,5 days (all I had).
    Now. I have a consistency issue. I had it with EC, and I have it with potty training. I am alone in believing in the process. My husband thinks it is all more or less crazy. He will do the same as me (and he has all along), but only once it has started working. And if it does not require an extra effort.
    The nanny won’t quit the diapers for now, I guess until there are no more accidents (?), but then my son cannot learn until he us left without diapers …
    So. I am the crazy pee-poop-obsessed mom. This mom has been travelling for work a lot lately, knowing that my son is – most probably – not being potty-trained at home “By Andrea’s Book”. So it is dragging on…

    I would really really enjoy a podcast about Husband Resistance !! Pleeeeaaaase . I have been meaning to ask you that for… Nearly 18 months ! ;) :-) And I could totally share my experience on this.

    Thanks again for all the work !

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on January 14, 2022 at 6:41 pm

      Remember to be gentle on yourself. Husband Resistance is a rough one. Here is a post I have done on the topic: https://godiaperfree.com/when-daddy-wont-do-ec-how-to-get-your-husband-on-board-with-toilet-training-and-possibly-save-your-marriage/

  5. Avatar Anna on February 1, 2022 at 9:22 am

    Hey Andrea! I am attempting to wrap things up with my twin 17m olds and while one is doing great and is in underwear during the day, the other is resisting like crazy! I have tried giving privacy but she just screams for 5-10 minutes until I finally give in and take her off. Just a few weeks ago she was doing great and telling me 75% of the time and then all of a sudden, literally within 24 hours she just quit and cries every time we go potty. She will sometimes tell me when she needs to poop and will occasionally pee in the tub but that’s it. Any advice would be most welcome!

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on March 8, 2022 at 3:10 am

      Hi! Sounds like your little one is resisting going to the potty, which often happens when we over offer or need to start pushing back the amount of time between pees. Therefore, try backing off a little or offering less often.

  6. Avatar Molly on March 14, 2022 at 2:20 pm

    Hi Andrea! I loved this episode, it’s given me a few ideas but I’m dealing with a scenario that isn’t quite addressed here.

    My 17mo old does fine sitting on the toilet with a seat reducer and we catch some pees, working on poops. The issue is that during commando time he freaks out when I whisk him to the toilet after a miss. He cries and refuses to sit, I think because he isn’t independent in those moments. Should I set commando time aside and just focus on the EC/natural timing part of things for a while longer?

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on May 3, 2022 at 4:24 pm

      Hi! Focusing on his timing to get him to the potty before he pees will definitely help.

  7. Avatar Nikki on May 25, 2022 at 11:41 am

    I’ve been part-time ECing since 6 weeks old. Now at 15 months old, my daughter has a yeast rash that refuses to clear up with any kind of diapers (seems to be worse during the hot and humid days), so I feel an urgency to get her out of diapers.
    We were progressing well, catching 98% of poops on the toilet and having various pottytunities during the day. She even woke up dry for a few mornings, and last month she began signing when she needed to go.

    She’s been in underwear for most of the last 2 days and is now resisting the toilet — both her toddler potty and the toilet seat reducer. She cries and kicks if I try to get her to sit on them, even after she’s signed that she needs to potty. She’s usually fine once she’s seated and distracted with a book, but getting her seated is a huge struggle. If it weren’t for her rash, I would backtrack and not push it. I’m just at a loss. We’ve tried extra privacy and giving her the independence to go to the toddler potty without help, but she refuses everything at this point. Is 2 days in a big hump, and I just need to be patient for a little longer?

    I’ve been binge-listening to your podcasts and appreciate all that you share! EC has been amazing for us this last year. My husband brags to everyone who will listen, so he’s doing what he can to spread EC to others!

    • Andrea Olson Andrea Olson on May 26, 2022 at 5:12 pm

      First off, you are doing great! Using undies was a great call! Try to be patient, I know it can be hard and super frustrating. Doing some naked time for observation with a reset could help get her back on track. Definitely give it longer go, two days might not be long enough. Also, thank you so much for tuning in to the podcasts!

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