The 9 EC No-no’s: a few things you’ll want to avoid when doing EC

This is the Go Diaper Free Podcast with Andrea Olson, session 4 - let’s get into a new frame of mind. 

Welcome to the Go Diaper Free Podcast, where we're all about teaching you how to stop changing diapers, starting at birth. And now your host...She only had to deal with one week of poopy diapers...Andrea Olson.

That is so true. So, we have successfully covered thus far why we go diaper-free, part 1 of what is EC, when to begin, and now we’re on to what can trip you up. I am Andrea, and in this episode of the Go Diaper Free Podcast, we’re going to cover what can get in your way. What can make EC feel like a subtle version of hell. 

I call ‘em the 9 EC no-no’s. They are things you’ll want to avoid at all costs.

First: The #1 thing that parents need to know about EC? With EC, it’s all about you. EC is about your commitment, your attitude, and your consistency, as a parent. You are guiding the ship. You get the honor of helping your baby do what he can’t yet do for himself. As with feeding and helping your baby sleep, you should learn how to do it and be consistent.

Which leads to the other piece: we do not live in tribal community, so you’ll need to sit down and learn EC. It’s just how it is. It doesn’t have to be difficult, time-consuming, or complex. Find a good program or method and commit to it. Because although every good little newborn pees when he’s held in position...most parents who wing it end up in trouble in months to come.

Ok, more on this later...

First, let’s address 9 of the major physical and mental no-no’s that could get in your way! (By the way, number 9 is THE most important one! I’ve saved the best for last.) We’ll take a quick look at all of these and then decide if what I am saying makes sense to you.

The 9 Biggest EC No-no’s Are:

1. putting off beginning
2. half-assing it
3. mis-using diaper-free time
4. relying solely on the clock
5. returning to work without a plan!
6. not doing the initial work
7. making life “all potty”
8. getting stuck in the EC culture
9. winging it

Alright here we go...

1. Putting off beginning
   

Here’s the thing: babies are born ready. We’re talking about you, the parent, now. The question is, are you ready? Just an FYI, things never settle down when you’re a new parent. Once you’ve gotten the ropes, the rules change. The first window of opportunity to start EC is 0-4 months. From there on up to 18 months, it is totally doable, but the game changes at each stage. Plain & simple? Most parents regret that they didn’t start EC earlier.

2. Half-assing it
   

No, no, no...You do not have to do EC full time, but yes, when you do do it, you should be committed and consistent (as you are with feeding and napping). Half-assing it causes confusion, rebellion, and in general, pee everywhere.

3. Mis-using naked diaper-free time (yes, this can backfire on you!)
   

Let’s just say that naked diaper-free time is great...to a point. One, do you want your baby habitually peeing all over your floor for 2 years? Two, if your baby is only potty trained while naked, your baby is not potty trained. And three, unless you live in a nudist colony, we wear clothes in the Western world. And, to clarify, “diaper-free” means free from dependence upon diapers. Got it? :) 

 

4. Relying solely on the clock (disregarding the other, more important, more lasting indicators)

A baby who is ECed solely on by-the-clock timing will resist this in later months....just a heads up! I met a gal once who said they gave up EC with their newborn after 2 months because she just couldn’t handle taking him to the bathroom every half hour on the half hour. I asked, “Is that how you were taught to do it?” She was winging it off of free info she got on the internet. Relying on the clock is not enough.

5. Returning to work without a plan

When you go back to work, you need a bullet-proof plan to keep you committed to helping your baby pee when he needs to. Many moms give up, get really loose with it, or totally melt down when they return to work and try to do EC without a plan.

6. Not doing the initial work
   

Some parents skip the up-front work when starting EC. They sorta skip that part about observing, learning signals, and getting familiar with natural rhythms and such. Then, when the little one gets a mind of her own, the parent is constantly a step behind. Not fun at all.

7. Making life “all potty”
   

Making life “all potty” will result in potty rebellion. This includes hovering and extends even further into driving baby crazy with praise, questions, overtalking, trying to control your baby’s pottying, and showing off to friends. Trust me, you’ll want to avoid this. It’s a tricky balance to do something you’ve never done before and not make your life “all about it.” Ya know?

8. Getting stuck in the EC culture
   

Although community support in EC is vital and the mommie lists can be awesome (oh, my, especially those Facebook groups!)...be warned. If you get too comfortable as part of this particular community, kinda like at the Hotel California, you can check out anytime you like but you may never leave.

And you will want to be done pottying your baby someday, yeah? This is why my forum at godiaperfree.com is so great. Although I love you, I actually want you to eventually leave. So you’ll have support in being done when you and your baby are actually done.

And please, don’t get me wrong! I am a member of all the EC lists out there and there are tons of helpful mothers & brilliant replies. I just don’t recommend getting too attached it all. Make sense?

9. Winging it
   

All this said, you can totally just wing it and do whatever you’ve found out on mommie blogs and websites. You could join a forum or email list and get free advice. These things could actually be enough for a small percentage of ECing parents. However, I’ve seen this way too many times: any small baby will pee when you hold them over the sink and cue.

So you think you’re doing EC but maybe you’re just getting lucky. And after a few weeks, things start to get tricky. In 12 months, you’ve got serious problems and don’t know why.

It’s amazing that, as simple as EC is to start when you have the proper guidance and visual instruction, without that there are so many ways it can backfire if you wing it. There is so much great advice out there that winging it may waste your time, confuse you, and leave you feeling defeated. For instance: getting 40 replies in a Facebook post about what to do for “x” problem, trying them all, and giving up. 40 DIFFERENT REPLIES. It can be vastly confusing. All advice from parents who’ve ECed one or two children. Take it with a grain of salt, or get centralized support like what we’ve got goin on at the godiaperfree forum.

So, start with a method, an approach, a tried-and-true process, from the beginning, and experience a smoother journey. Get an expert’s support, somehow. Especially someone who’s done the research and has experience beyond their own child. It really makes a difference. 

What’s Next?

Now remember, the #1 thing parents need to know about Elimination Communication? It’s all about you. Your baby was born ready. Are you ready to take the next step? 

Visit me at godiaperfree.com for an entire community of resources that were created in order to avoid these common no- no’s. We are updating this community every week, and you’ll find lots of people who are getting serious about trying EC, from all over the world. 

So that’s it for this episode of the Go Diaper Free Podcast: The 9 EC No-no’s and what to do to avoid them all. Tweet me @GoDiaperFree with your favorite No-no that you’re going to work on avoiding. I love hearing from you.

You can find a full transcript of this episode plus the show notes at GoDiaperFree.com/04.

In our next episode, we will cover Doing EC + Having a life: an introduction to part-time EC. So many folks think that you MUST do EC full-time, around the clock, and be with your baby 24/7 for it to work. Simply put: that’s not true. Most parents do EC part- time and I will share with you bits about why and how. Whether you work outside of the home or you’re just looking to do EC with some balance, this episode is for you.

Thanks again for listening - see you next time!